Some good thoughts

For your consideration

There is a guy I don’t much like, and he doesn’t like me. It’s pretty rare for me to be on such generally shoddy terms with someone. By the grace of God he’s now my neighbour.

I have to tell you the odds of this happening. I’m spending the bulk of this summer in an essentially off-grid hamlet in interior BC. It is boat access only, and there are fewer than 10 houses here. And here happens to live this guy that I have an awkward history with and whom I do not care for.

I don’t hate this guy, but I do sort of disdain him; I deem him a low character individual. Thinking about him makes me dislike him more, I scrunch up my nose at his odious deeds and general haplessness. God bless him, of course, in theory. No, not in theory — I am commanded to love him! But how?

A good thought I had is this. What is the best case scenario of my relationship with this fellow? Well, I suppose the best case scenario would be, if he and I were friends for life, and we loved each other, and worked together on building a community.

In order for this to be true, we would have to get to know each other a lot better and grow a foundation of deep mutual respect and trust, and we would have to have joked around a lot and enjoyed each others company, we would have many magical conversations under our shared belt, and we would owe each other, in innumerable ways.

I recommend this practice of imagining the best case scenario. Not because I think visualizing it will make it come true. I have no opinion on that. But it has helped me like this guy more.

The true best case scenario will always be weirder and more beautiful than my imaginings. The best case scenario is such because it was ordained by God. We can choose whether or not to accept God’s invitation.

For some people, the best case scenario will be that they become your wife or husband. For others, the best case scenario will be that you have a reasonably pleasant interaction with them. Call the best case scenario “destiny.”

I am not much of a determinist. If destiny exists, then it does not exist in the future: it exists in eternity! And as Christianity teaches, eternity is our destiny.

C.S. Lewis says, in The Weight of Glory, we ought to remember that everyone we meet is destined for eternity. Even the most boring or irritating person may one day be a creature so glorious which, if you saw it now, you would be strongly tempted to worship. Let us hold in our minds the glory of the other’s truest self.

So I make a habit of trying to see people as the golden-gods which they ought to be, especially if I have been finding them boring or annoying, or judging them at all.

Imagine if they were here in their golden-god nature. I certainly would not be judging them, I would be in awe of them, like a child. I would feel that they were my older brother or sister, I would adore and trust them. They would command my dutiful attention at least.

A funny thing happens when I remember to think this way. I actually am able to see their ideal nature a little bit. At least, certain qualities of theirs that I may not have noticed. Quiet strength, a potential for resonance.

Lewis says, it is a serious thing to live in a society of potential gods and goddesses. You have never met an ordinary person, never talked to a mere mortal.

Also, every time you leave the house you encounter people in such pain. . . It’s so hard out here. You and I are blessed and happy, for whatever reason. But it is a serious thing to meet every day a divine creature with a glorious destiny, struggling under an unspeakable burden, broken. . . We have to be so much more present. How can we ever be passive under such conditions? How do we ever pass up an opportunity to care? What an exciting mission we are on!